7 Tips on How to be a more Happy & Confident you
In today’s world there are so many factors that can go into one’s happiness. I have had a wonderful life but I am the happiest now than I have ever been. There is no quick fix and I’m sorry there is no such think as a happy pill for this but you get what you give and I am a firm believer that what you put out there in the universe comes back to you. I know happiness and confidence especially is always somewhat on a tipping scale. One factor can change the entire dynamic, but I have found a few simple ways that have improved my outlook on life as well as on myself.
- You must have a purpose. I am not talking about curing cancer here folks (although that would be wonderful)… I am talking about having a purpose in your life that you strive for, fight for and that drives you. When I say purpose, I don’t mean a job. I have had plenty of “jobs” from retail to hospitality to even a flight attendant for a short time. Each one of them were unfulfilling and made me feel like I was on an overgrown hamster wheel. Starting my blog, although it hasn’t been an easy road, was the best thing that ever happened to me. I feel like no matter what, my blog (my purpose) cannot be taken away from me (unlike a job can) and it keeps me moving in a positive direction every day. Trust me, having a real purpose is such a confidence booster.
- You must have a positive body image. I feel good when I look good. Sounds kind of shallow in writing but when my hair isn’t done or my nails look horrible or my skin is breaking out, it’s hard for me to feel my best. It goes beyond the surface level too. When I started working out this year, I started to feel SOOO much better about myself. Yes, you have to work for it but I have seen such a change in my body as well as my mindset once I found a workout I could commit to and love. It’s important to nourish your body and keep it heathy. I changed my diet and started trying to treat my body better. I have always been a skinny person but I have never had muscle definition like I do now. I feel like every outfit I wear now that I have had for a while looks so much better on me now that I have made working out and treating my body better a priority and it feels so good! When I ate fast food all the time and was drinking 4 glasses of wine a night (yes girl… that was my life for years) I felt horrible. Changing your lifestyle changes your outlook…and a good mani and pedi never hurt anyone either lol.
- If it’s not doing you any good, remove it from your life. This is soooo important!!!!! Once I removed all of the negative factors affecting me in my life, everything all of a sudden improved. Many times, it’s not you, it’s your environment. If you have a job you hate, have a toxic relationship with a significant other or spouse, a family thats unsupportive, or jealous friends that aren’t really your friends… how are you supposed to be happy and confident? It is so exhausting to supplement friendships or romantic relationships that only bring you pain or put the majority of your time in jobs that are just taking you nowhere but down. If it’s not making you better, get rid of it. That goes for friends, family, real estate etc. lol. Once I got rid of all negative factors in my life, my life completely changed overnight for the better and I don’t miss a single thing that I discarded! You won’t either. I’ve dealt with this first hand. You think you need certain people, relationships, or jobs in your life so you keep holding on to them but trust me, you don’t need any of that mess in your life. Even if things didn’t use to be this way or you had a great friendship or relationship in the past and now it’s just filled with negativity and manipulation, move on dear…just move on. Not everyone is supposed to ride the train of your life to the end of the tracks. Appreciate the good times you had but realize when those times are long gone. You’re stronger that you think and your holding onto things that make you unhappy. Do this now!!!! Life is too short!!!
- At the same time, foster the relationships with all of the good people in your life. If you have that one OG friend that has supported you from day one and always will, or a family member who loves and supports you no matter what or even a boss or mentor that has always pushed you in the right direction… honor and love them. You don’t need a ton of friends for example, you need quality friends and make sure you give them back what they give you. Support them when they have tough times, celebrate their achievements and their successes and make sure you are not just taking their support but giving it back to them as well. Relationships go both ways! Oh, and never be jealous of them either. Your day will come.
- I struggle with this one still to this day but don’t be afraid to talk about what’s bothering you. This point is simple. Don’t let it fester. If something is bothering you, speak up. If you don’t like something that is affecting your life, have the courage to confront what is happening. Problems don’t go away by themselves so don’t wait around silently forever hoping things will change. They won’t. Confront the issues and if they don’t change, refer to tip number 3.
- If it’s not going to matter in five years, don’t waste your tears. I’m an emotional person and my dad told me this years ago and it has stuck with me ever since. If someone says something mean to you or you have a bad day, trust me that in five years you wont even remember being upset about it. If you have to, only get upset over things that have a long term affect on you. Examples include, illnesses or lost love ones, something that negatively could ruin your career, injuries and bad relationships etc. Otherwise, move on. Don’t be mad about that one bad grade you got on a test or that mean girl talking behind your back. You have so much more ahead of you. Basically don’t stress yourself out over things that won’t affect you years from now.
- Become a “the glass is half full” type of person by always reminding yourself it can always be worse. Take your wins with your loses and put a positive spin on what is going on. That being said, don’t ignore your problems either or cover them up with a false sense of positivity(tip number 6). My point is that there are few problems where there are no solutions and in the past the worst situations at the time in my life lead me to much bigger and better things in the future. This one is easier said than done but I know you can do it! I have faith in you!
Photography by: BanAvenue Photography
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